Dead Hedgehog Ball & Chain Roadtrip Full write up
I still remember the phone call back in october when Ash told me he was getting married and the stag do was gonna be a roadtrip. Well this had best be one hell of a roadtrip I thought! I lost count of the number of phone calls me and Ash had about the route, T shirt design, how much it was gonna cost, nights on the internet trying to find accomodation for a big group, who's coming, who has put money down etc etc. Now it's all done I've gotta say I'm stoked with it all. If we had to do it all again I wouldn't change a thing, except making Will stay on for the sunday.

Wednesday 25th April
By the time I got to Ash's late wednesday Sid, Jo and Ross were already there and getting stuck into the mini bus, ripping out seats. The beer was flowing already and after some tasty pasta from Karen I thought it was time to unleash the joke shop goodies, fony dog poo, scouser wig, beer goggles and of course the rubber tits! Andy and Giles turned up later and after a load of jive talking we bedded down on Ash's floor. Exept for Giles who decided sleeping in his car was gonna be more comfy.

Thursday 26th April
The day started at the greasy spoon cafe in true roadtrip style, lots of beans and bacon to get bowels rolling and scolding hot tea and coffee to ruin your tongue for the next few days. For a bunch of BMXers to be on time anywhere is nothing short of amazing, but by about 10am Selwood, Paul Meecher, & Denis where there shortly followed by Steve and the nite rider: Will, who had never been spotted at this time of day before!

Bikes were stacked, bags and bits squeezed in to every conceivable gap and before you could say 'how dare you mess with an evil ninja' the wheels were rolling and we were on the road to Corby. Joke shop novelties were put to good use to anybody who dared look into the van on the motorway.

Arriving at Corby we joined forces with El & Nick in his van, which became bike transporter from here on in. Spirits were high, everyone was pleased to see each other and itching to ride. Corby was empty and in no time people were bombing about like hyperactive toddlers.

Pretty much as soon as Sid started riding his back went for a Burton. Seems a night on Ash's floor had not done Sid's back the world of good so he sat out on the riding front. The park was much warmer than the sub zero temperatures of last visit. Everyone started to get stuck in while those with new bikes: me, Andy & Jo, spent a a lot of time on the sidelines, spanners in hand, dialing in our rides.

The street section was being ripped up by super speed Steve & Will, while Giles started moving bits of ramp around for transfers. Selwood was cruising around on his new school bender! Everyone else sessioned the jump box/rhythmn section non stop. Denis was in the foam pit faster than a rat up a drainpipe, and could be found flinging 360 tailwhip attempts over the resi box as the day went on.

I learnt to drop in on a skateboard and the woman gave everyone grief for not wearing their helmets. Paul Meecher started to bust out big 360's over the box and Steve had his massive wallride line going on.
We packed our sweaty bods back in the van to make our way up towards Nottingham Travelodge. Funky trip hop was pumping out the stereo and I tell you what, we had our own rave going on in that mini bus, set with flashing lights from the fire engine in front. Bloody ace!

Friday 27th April
Friday started a bit slower while we waited for Giles & Will to get up! After a while we were back on the road heading for Warrington. Ash got into 'head down work mode' and nearly killed us all before stopping at the random roadside burger van. Sid's back was looking pretty knackered and gave him lots of jip moving about, but he decided to stay on the trip as a pedestrian. Nice one Sid!

This journey seemed to take forever, the van inhabitants resorted to entertaining the public while passing thru Huddersfield. Class moment from Will: leaning out the window, donned with wig, beer goggles and fake tits: "Hellooo Huddersfield!!!" has anyone got this on video?

After a few laps of Warrington we found the park and man was it worth the wait! Concrete haven with tons of lines, hips & transfers. For me this was the best park and was also the only one on the trip I've never ridden before. Steve was flying around, Meecher started to go big while El and Nick showed the lines learnt from their previous visit.

We settled down into a corner of the park while Denis went into standby mode in the mini bus, only coming out for a tea-time nose wheelie. Jo took a bad stack with a 'roll in' wipe out, diving into the bowl and smashing up his knee. He was pretty much out for the rest of the trip with pumkin knee.

It's always great to ride outside on a sunny day and this session reminded me of Rom trips or days at the Rec from way back. People chilling, others having a good sesh, someone going for a beer run, oh dear. Liverpool here we come...

As the evening came around we drove into Liverpool to the Hostel, home for the next 2 nights. Walking down the corridor I could smell the skunk already, I wondered for a second whether we would ever see that £140 deposit we just put down. Oh well best not to rely on it eh!

By this time it was late so a mad dash was on for Wetherspoons before they stopped serving food. This was followed by a visit to the legendary Hebejebes bar. Nowhere was gonna let 14 scruffy bastards like us in, so we split into groups. As we edged closer to the bouncers, Ross edged his 3/4 shorts down to seem like full length ankle swingers. But the bouncers were having none of it, "no 3/4's in here mate!" Drastic measures followed as I went into the bar. No sooner had Den taken his jeans off for me to smuggle out, Ross appeared. Seems the bouncers had let him in once he knew how far we'd come. Lucky for everyone else that den didn't have to spend the rest of the night in his pants!

Things got pretty messy from here on. Sambuca, Will breakdancing, hitting my head on the ceiling beams, and a can the size of a cupboard is all I remember!

Saturday 28th April
'Jaded' was pretty much the word of the morning, in second place to 'mong!' Things ran quite slow, some made it for breakfast, while those who got in a 6am carried on pushing out Z's while still in their Dead Hedgehog shirts from last night.

Selwood spotted the perfect novelty in a joke shop for Ash to wear tonight: A pair of boxers with plastic hanging butt cheeks and a full on wanger out front. There was no question as to whether or not to buy it. Jo even managed to find a walking stick to help him get around a bit better.

Eventually we got our asses into the van for another 'where's the skatepark gone to' mission as we went in search of Rampworx. This park gets better every time I go there and looked bloody ace. Too bad I was hanging it the most. I opted to be mainly camera man today, sessioning the ghetto cafe. Class!

Meanwhile, the 'cannons went off' as Den put it. Den & Paul hit some big airs on the big quarter. Den did a 540 from high to low section. Ash got his groove on with the sticky out tight transition bit, busting inverts and cherokees. Nick and El sessioned the rythmn/jump section super smooth. Nick took a bad slam over one of the volcanos. Guest beermxer: Toby skated and rode just about everything in the whole park. Andy & Ross got into the mini/bowl. Meecher got his first whip to pedals up the step up. As for Steve, bloody hell, that guy is full throttle. He went off even doing the step up in reverse: 10ft to flat. Lucky for him the session ended before he totally wiped himself out, though a massive wall tap sent him to a front wheel hang as last trick.

Heading back to the hostel we dropped Will off at the station so he could get back for work.
Shower in a can and we were back in wetherspoons for dinner. Stag night! We were all donned with the Dead Hedgehog Ball & Chain Roadtrip shirts but all visibly knackered. Three days of riding had taken it's toll. A slow couple of beers and we moved on to the Crazy House, THE rock club in Liverpool.

By the time I got in and found Ash they had a massive pile of Red Stripe cans, I mean like over 30 cans stacked up ready, woah. Moving upstairs to the non death metal room, Ash put his novelty pants into effect. Fake knob hanging out and everything but nobody batted an eyelid. I guess it must be common place to see knobs in the Crazy House!??

Before long the night got going and somehow the knob got seperated from the pants, ending up stuck to Denis' forehead. In fact Denis was wearing all of the novelties by the end of the night! On the way out we were all shocked and amazed to discover Ash's doppellganger, his double, Ash in 10 years. Gotta get the pics off my phone.

Amazingly all 14 of us found each other outside of Crazy House but got lost on the way home. All I remember is Denis walking along having a piss then someone calling out, 'write your name'. Well, if anyone has been to King of Concrete you'll know Denis responds to anything you shout at him! It was so funny I just shut down laughing. Ash was on a mission for more beer so went with Steve while the rest of us crashed out.

Sunday 29th April
I woke up to find Steve and Ash asleep in their clothes, then I had a flashback of being woken up around 6, having the fake tits shuved in my face. Checkout was supposed to be by 10am but Ash and Steve were not having any of it. Desperate measures followed with the whole crew forcibly removing Steve from his bed, tipping it up on its end. Ash was next up, removing the duvet people had to divert their eyes to avoid an eyefull of ash nads. Upon closer inspection we realised that the idea of getting that deposit back seemed pretty slim in the light of things!

Outside, the YHA looked like the scene of a plane disaster as members of the roadtrip were crashed out at random all over the grass. Ash finally emerged and we got the full deposit back before they could check the rooms. A swift get away was needed...so we moved the vans all the way around the back of the building, then proceeded to play football for quarter of an hour. They'll never find us here!

Ash was still pissed so Giles took over the mini bus on route to Birmingham. Arriving at Epic was pretty taxing as everyone had to remember their name and email addresses so they could get in the park. I don't even know how Ash got in! To say the session was mellow would be an understatement. Most people rode for a bit only to get the 'wah wahs', opting for the safety of the cafe. All except for Paul Meacher who rode as hard as every other day. I'm sure that guy is a robot! Giles seemed in his element at Epic and made the trick of the day with an alley oop wallride over the driveway and other creative transfers around the park. Doris (his bike) did take a fair beating though!

For me, one of the best bits of the whole trip was in the bar at Epic, everyone sat down chillin, having a pint and laughing about the last few days. All the time put into the trip had paid off, everyone seemed stoked, even Sid & Jo, the walking wounded! Selwood hadn't had a bad slam. To make things even better we got a 'lock in' to the bar and skatepark after closing. The barmaid even made us all sandwiches for the journey home. Stoked!

Roll on the next one...Ball & chain Forever

Check out Ross' pics from the Ball & Chain Roadtrip. Click on the gallery above